Everything I Wish I Had
by Purrmeow
Summary: Chapter Four UP!!! Nittle Grasper and Bad Luck are having a joint concert to increase record sales, but Ryuichi has a plan that could make even more records sell. Could this plan somehow get between Shuichi's feelings for Yuki?
1. Chapter 1

Everything I wish I had  
Author: Purrmeow  
Author's notes: This is my very first Gravitation ficcie (product of   
Gravit-a-thon), and it took me a while to come up with the idea, so I hope that   
you enjoy it. Now, I am not the biggest fan of Fujisaki, but I do love Sakuma   
and Shuichi, so I hope that I am not to OOC for Fujisaki. I am also leaving for   
Japan in two and a half weeks (for ten months), so I will try to write as much   
as I can before I go, so please wait for me ^-^! After watching Gravitation   
again, I realize a few errors in my idea, but I hope you will accept them as is.  
Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation, it is the product of someone else's   
imagination, so don't sue for copyright values. I'm poor and you would end up   
losing money in lawyer fees, so it's not really worth it, now is it?   
  
Chapter One  
  
The stick of strawberry pocky hung limply from the vocalist's pink lips,   
swinging back and forth as he stared out into empty space. His boredom was   
mirrored in the blank face of the red head that sat across from him, chocolate   
pocky hanging from the guitarist's mouth, while his fingers tapped at the wood   
of the table rhythmatically. Even the strict Fujisaki lay with his head on the   
table, a pen in hand tapping on a blank scale, leaving tiny dots, but no music.  
  
They had gone almost a week with no new publicity, no public events, and not a   
single song had spilt from the prestigious pop idols; however, there was no real   
pressure to come up with new music, or at least not yet. Their cross country   
tour had ended, and they had enjoyed a short vacation only recently, but the way   
things were going lately, one would doubt they had done anything of importance.   
  
Toying with pink strands of thick hair, Shuichi groaned, " Na, Hiro-"  
  
The door burst open, and the ever energetic Mr. K stepped into the room, rifle   
craddled in his hand as though it were part of the appendage. "Big News!" He   
announced, the english slurred as it spilt from his lips. Startled by the sudden   
appearance of their eccentric manager, the three shot up in their seats and   
their expectant eyes glued to the laughing blonde.  
  
" There is a joint concert between Bad Luck and Nittle Grasper scheduled for two   
days from now!" His blue eyes swept across the room, searching for the shock and   
excitement he had expected from the group, however, no one budged.  
  
" I don't mean to burst your bubble or anything," Hiro began," but we have   
already had several joint concerts with-" The click of the rifle locking against   
his temple silenced the red head, and his spine stiffened.  
  
" No, not like this you haven't." The comment captivated the attention of the   
previously uninterested men, their confused stares beckoning for a reason from   
the gun wielding blonde.  
  
"SHUICHI!!!!" The door burst open yet again, and a hyperactive brunette flew   
through and clung to the pink haired singer; the impact forcing him out of his   
chair, and sending the pair tumbling to the floor. The bright chocolate eyes of   
Sakuma Ryuichi spakled at Shuichi, as the dizzy vocalist attempted to regain his   
composure.   
  
" Shuichi! Did you just hear, I'm so excited! I get to sing with the famous   
Shindou Shuichi! Ureshii!!!!!!!(1)" The bouncing brunette annouced in one huge   
breath and squeezed Shuichi into breathlessness yet again.  
  
"Shuichi?" Ryuichi questioned, confused as to why the other was silent.  
  
The purple eyed man blinked, then blinked again, the information sinking into   
his head as his lungs filled with oxygen once more. His eyes widened, and he   
drew in a deep breath, as he too began to sparkle. " I get to sing with   
Sakuma-san." He turned huge, glittery, purple eyes to his idol," Sakuma-san,"   
and glomped the also sparkling brunette, cheering in a gitty frenzy on the   
ground.   
  
Pulling his rifle away from Hiro's tense body, their manager haughtily   
commented," Okay, well I guess you all now know what the big news is." Two pairs   
of eyes blinked a few times, gaze shooting from the excited vocalists to the   
grinning Mr.K.  
  
" But... How?" Fujisaki questioned, unsure as to why they were now expected to   
pair up with their rival band in a concert. " The are our riva-"  
  
"Were. Our rivals." K corrected, " Apparently Ryuichi insisted that he be able   
to sing with Shindou-san yet again." They turned their attentions again to the   
giggling pair, who had not yet left their fantasy world, surrounded in   
glittering shoujo bubbles.  
  
" Both bands are to perform the same songs together, a few Bad Luck songs, and a   
few of Nittle Grasper's. We will be playing at Zepp Tokyo yet again, and the   
show is already sold out, so no objections." Mr.K finalized the plans before   
turning to leave the room, a smile curling on his lips as he made his way over   
to the vocalists. Literally tearing Ryuichi off of Shuichi, he dragged the teary   
and yearning man across the carpet. " I'll return this first." He dryly   
commented as the chibified singer protested.  
  
"Shuichi!" The call repeated over and over again, the voice slowly fading as the   
brunette disappeared further and further down the hallway.  
  
For a few moments silence stretched in the empty room, and the dishelven Shuichi   
crawled into his chair, flustered and embarrased. The hands of the clock clicked   
with each second, tick-tick-tick.  
  
" WAIT ONE MINUTE!" The fratic Fujisaki shouted, leaping from his chair. " We   
have TWO DAYS to learn an entire concert worth of their songs!" The youngest   
screamed at the guitarist and vocalist, seeming to age visibly from the stress   
overload. While, Hiro picked at his fingernails, feet thrown onto the table,   
completely ignoring the sixteen year old; and Shuichi innocently munched on a   
few sticks of pocky.  
  
" How can you two be so calm about this?! THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!" The dark haired   
teen panicked, lifting Shuichi out of his chair, and ravenously shaking the   
innocent man back and forth.  
  
Flopping like a rag doll in the grip of the teenager, he placed a shaky hand   
atop Fujisaki's arm, the blue haired teen already heaving from stress. " Hiro   
and I have been playing Nittle Grasper songs since we first met," Shuichi tried   
to calm down the other, pointing out how simple and stressless the situation   
would be.  
  
Releasing the vocalist, Fujisaki slumped to the ground, head in his hands, "   
oh... so your fine." He honestly could have cried right then and there, but was   
too shocked to do anything but shudder.  
  
Lifting himself out of his chair, Hiro calmly approached his koohai, kneeling   
next to the stress paralyzed teenager. " Don't worry, we'll just practice."   
Smiling, Hiro patted the youth on the back, continuing, " At least it's not   
tomorrow," laughing at his own cruel joke.  
  
" Not funny." Fujisaki retorted, slowly standing, his eyes piercing into   
Shuichi's innocent purple eyes, as the vocalist stared at the two. "We have to   
practice. Now." His strict orders left no room for objetion, as he lifted his   
music sheets off of the table and guided the others towards the practice room.  
  
Intercepting the three in the hallway, was the familiar face of their manager,   
Mr.K; accompanied by the now composed Sakuma Ryuichi, Seguchi Tohma, and Ukai   
Noriko. " Did I forget to mention that you will all be practicing together?" K   
questioned, his eyes falling on the sweatdropping Fujisaki, who nearly collapsed   
at the news.  
  
~***~   
  
The practice had taken both bands late into the evening, and Shuichi wanted   
nothing more than to just get home to his Yuki and cuddle up against his love.   
Dragging himself up the stairs to their apartment, Shuichi lethargically slipped   
the keys out of his pocket, and unlocked the door. Falling into the apartment,   
he tiredly called out," Tadaima!"(2)  
  
His own voice echoed off of the walls of the empty apartment, and he listened   
carefully for a reply, or at least some noise that would signify the presence of   
his lover. Crawling from room to room, he found no one; everything was in order,   
all of their furniture was still there. " Where did Yuki go?" Shuichi asked no   
one in particular, as he returned to the ominously large living room, feeling   
both worried, and alone. The red blinking on the answering machine caught his   
eye, and he rushed over to the phone stand, looming over the inanimate object as   
though he were going to attack.  
  
He pressed the play button and listened carefully, " You have one new message."   
The machine beeped and began to play the message." Wednesday, August 5, 6:56 PM;   
Normally I would not call, but," The deep, and instantly recognizable voice of   
Yuki Eiri, sounded from the answering mahine, causing Shuichi's eyes to light   
up. " I will be in Kyoto for the next few days, speaking to my editor. I'm   
calling to tell you that I will be home in three days, don't destroy the   
apartment." And the machine beeped once more, signifying the end of the message,   
" You have no more messages." With the press of a button, Shuichi silenced the   
machine and slumped onto the couch.  
  
Yuki was going to be gone for three days, his concert was in two... would he be   
able to last until then? His confidence slowly began to slip, and the   
apartment's emptiness began to effect the vocalist even more. He wanted to cry,   
but what good would it do? There was no way he and Yuki could always be at one   
another's sides... right? He just had to get used to it.  
  
" It's only three days, I'll last." He reassured himself, and picked up the   
remote, turning on the TV. He aimlessly flipped through the channels, searching   
for anything of remote interest. " I'll just watch some TV." Shuichi stated,   
leaning back against the leather sofa, sinking into the cushions, as he stared   
blankly at the screen.  
  
In a split second, he dropped the remote, dived to the end of the couch, and   
picked up the phone, dialing Hiro's number. He let it ring once, twice,   
thrice... after the seventh ring, he heard Hiro's voice.  
  
"Hi! Hiro-," he stopped mid sentence, listening to the monotone of the answering   
machine.   
  
With a hopeless expression, he hung up the phone, feeling more alone than ever.   
Hiro was obviously not home, but he desperately needed company. Thinking for a   
few seconds in silence, he stared at the phone buttons, contemplating how to   
remedy the situation. An idea burst forward from the back of his mind and he   
speedily dialed the number, praying that the other was home.  
  
" Moshi Moshi no da!"(3) The energetic voice nearly sang through the phone.  
  
" Sakuma-san! Is that you?!" Shuichi hurriedly asked, begging that it was not   
another answering machine.  
  
" Hai, who's that?"   
  
" Shindou Shuichi." He hurriedly replied.  
  
" Shuichi... Shuichi... Shuichi." Ryuichi repeated, trying to figure out who it   
was. " Shuichi!!" He happily cried through the phone.  
  
" I know it's late, but... I was wondering if you wanted to come over? It's   
really lonely and..." Shuichi heard the phone click, and a steady dial tone   
ringing in his ear. " Sakuma-san? Sakuma-san?" He asked the dial tone worriedly,   
' what could have happened?' He asked himself, hanging up the phone.  
  
" Sakuma-san..." Shuichi repeated, head drooping.   
  
" HAI!!" He heard through the wall, followed by heavy knocking.  
  
Head shooting up, he paced to the door, cracked it open, and peered outside.   
Instantly, he was tackled by a smiling Ryuichi, and sent flying to the ground,   
Ryuichi straddling, and hugging him.  
  
" Sakuma-san? How did you get here so fast?" Surprized, Shuichi, stared up in   
disbelief at the hyper brunette who had mounted him.   
  
" I don't really know." He replied, eyes upturned as he sought the answer,   
repeating the question to himself quietly. The idol was dressed in loose   
fitting, pink, bunny pajamas, and he had a pillow stuffed under one arm,   
Kumagoro(4) under the other.  
  
Halting the dark eyed vocalist, he injected, " Either way, thanks for coming."   
And he smiled thoughtfully, he had never before had a sleppover with Sakuma-san,   
and the mere thought was exhilerating.  
  
" Kumagoro loves sleep-overs no da!" Ryuichi cried out, grabbing his stuffed   
rabbit in a fierce grip, and rushing over to the couch, hopping on the cushiony   
surface.  
  
" Where does Kumagoro sleep?" He piped, smile going from ear to ear," Can   
Kumagoro sleep in the same room as Shuichi?"   
  
Shuichi rushed over to the couch, and he join Ryuichi at his side," Um. I guess   
you can sleep here on the couch. Yuki kinda gets mad if I sleep in his bed when   
he's not around." Shuichi innocently babbled, as the now silent Ryuichi stared   
at him, listening attentively. With no one to stop im from babbling on, he   
continued for a while, until he finally came to a conclusion, a good while   
later. " And he's not gonna be here for the concert."   
  
They sat in a brief silence as Ryuichi nodded slowly, " Kumagoro doesn't like it   
when Shu-chan's sad, Kumagoro wants to cheer up Shu-chan no da." He smiled   
mischeiviously, pouncing atop the unprepared Shuichi and tickling him profusely,   
growling playfully. Shuichi couldn't help but burst into laughter, rolling off   
of the couch with his idol still clinging to him.   
  
Even hitting the floor didn't interupt what the two were doing, and Shuichi   
desperately squirmed beneath Ryuichi screaming while laughing, " I surrender! I   
surrender!"   
  
His mood had definitely lightened, and the brunette didn't stop at the cry,   
instead his hands tickled even more, his eyes glued to his prey. A heavy   
pounding on the wall soon silenced the two, as the neighbour shouted for them to   
be quiet through the walls. Frozen in place, the two giggled like school girls,   
and Shuichi placed a careful finger up to his lips, and whispered, "shhhh."  
  
" Hey Shuichi, I have an idea for the concert." Ryuichi whispered, a   
mischeivious grin curling the corners of his mouth. Shuichi, intruiged by his   
senpai's offer, leaned close, listening as Ryuichi carefully whispered. " But   
it's our secret, don't tell anyone."   
  
Shuichi's eyes shot wide open, surprized at the suggestion of the seemingly   
innocent Ryuichi. "But, Sakuma-san..." He stopped, recalling where the idea for   
the concert had originated, as K had explained during practice. 'This will   
increase both the bands popularity, and record sales phenominally.' If   
Sakuma-san was right, then they may sell another million... and Yuki may take   
him on another date! The prospect was too good to pass up, so he readily nodded,   
a smile adorning his sparkling face.   
  
"Wai!" The brunette cried, and huriedly clasped a hand over his mouth; " gomen   
ne(5)," Ryuichi whispered, and crouched down, yawning.  
  
" I'll go get some blankets." Shuichi offered, a hand resting on his idol's   
shoulder, before he retreated to the closet. He returned with a couple of   
gigantic down quilts, to find Ryuichi snuggled up on the ground where he had   
left him, pillow under his head, and Kumagoro clenched tightly in his arms.   
Draping the blanket across the brunette, he left Ryuichi on the ground where he   
had fallen asleep; turning off all of the lights, he curled up on the couch, and   
sighed.  
  
" Shuichi?" A soft voice pleaded in the darkness.  
  
" Hai," Shuichi replied, " I thought you were asleep." He stated, surprized that   
Ryuichi was still awake.  
  
" Kumagoro really likes Shuichi."  
  
" Me too." Shuichi ended, listening as Ryuichi's breath steadied, and he began   
to snore. Eyes closing, he smiled, 'Yuki will take me out again.' With his goal   
set, his thoughts turned to the task that would achieve such.' Fan service...'   
And Shuichi silently slipped into a dream, imagining how their plan would work   
out, as well as he and Yuki's second date.  
  
  
End of Chapter One ~ I Hope you enjoyed that, I'm anxious to hear what people   
think about it. Reviews please.^-~!  
  
  
(1) Ureshii!!!- I'm so Happy!!!!!!!!!  
(2) Tadaima- (Said by Japanese people when they arrive at home) I'm Home.  
(3) Moshi Moshi- Hello (when answering the phone); no da- nonsense ( like la la   
la)   
(4) Kumagoro is Ryuichi's stuffed rabbit, for those of you who didn't know.  
(5) Gomen ne- I'm sorry 


	2. chapter 2

Everything I Wish I had  
Author: Purrmeow  
Author's notes: If any of you readers don't know what fan service is:  
1.) You have been very, very deprived  
2.) Think of two stars on stage, doing sexual type actions for their fans'   
enjoyment. (Think of Gackt in Vanilla, Mars tour tee hee!)  
  
Chapter Two  
  
The next day was relatively uneventful, resulting in straight practice with   
little to no breaks, leaving Shuichi feeling ragged. However, it wasn't practice   
itself was not that had the greatest effect on the vocalist, rather, having to   
keep he and Ryuichi's plans secret from everyone, even Hiro. But as the concert   
crept closer and closer, his anxiety grew, and he couldn't wait for the next   
day, eyes alight as he pranced out of the practice room, Ryuichi happily   
skipping at his side.  
  
Shuichi was still in awe though, at the transformation Ryuichi went through on   
stage, transforming into the serious, and alluring body that so many fangirls   
idolized; it was so different from the Sakuma-san he knew, it was as thought   
they were two different personalities trapped inside one body. His thoughts   
distracted him to the point that he almost completely missed Ryuichi shouting   
into his ear.  
  
"SHUICHI!!!" The hyperactive brunette shouted at the top of his lungs, curious   
eyes studying the pink haired vocalist.  
  
" Hai, gomen," Shuichi apologized, eyes downcast.  
  
" Does Shuichi want to have another sleep over?" Ryuichi happily replied, eyes   
sparkling as though he had already forgotten how Shuichi had previously been   
ignoring him.  
  
At first a little shocked at his idol's propostion, he smiled and replied, "   
Sure."   
  
" WAI!!" Ryuichi cried, grabbing a hold of Shuichi's hand and running," Kumagoro   
wants to get back fast and have lots of fun with Shu-chan no da!" The entire   
sentence blow out in one huge breath, and the pet name rolling off his lips as   
though he had always been using it.  
  
Ignoring the stupified looks of a few fangirls along the way, and also quickly   
averting their groping hands, the two men rushed at top speed, to Shuichi's   
apartment. Slamming the door closed behind them, Shuichi crouched, heaving, and   
attempted to catch his lost breath, Ryuichi prancing around him with the same   
energy he had left the studio with.  
  
'How does he do it?' Shuichi was a little puzzled, but quickly dismissed it as   
he was dragged into his own kitchen by a speed talking brunette.  
  
" Kumagoro wants chips, and pocky, and popcorn, and ice cream,and pop..." He   
went on for a minute straight, naming off every snack food Shuichi could think   
of, and even some the sweets loving vocalist had never heard of.  
  
Halting the other in midsentence, he answered, " Why don't we just start off   
with some pocky? Yuki doesn't usually let me fill up our cupboards with too much   
junk food. But he lets me have all the pocky I want." Shuichi smiled, pulling a   
couple packages of Strawberry pocky, followed by white chocolate, and a box of   
Men's pocky TM (don't laugh, I've seen it!)  
  
" Aww..." Ryuichi pouted, " This Yuki guy doesn't sound like very much fun no   
da." However, his expression soon changed, and he stole all of the pocky and ran   
into the living room, laughing.  
  
"Oi!" Shuichi hollered, chasing the far more energetic vocalist in circles,   
trying to keep up with the easily evading Ryuichi. It was really tiring, but   
Shuichi could not recall the last timehe had so much fun... on his date with   
Yuki, most likely.  
  
Collapsing onto the couch, Shuichi sighed, relaxing against the cushions as   
Ryuichi picked a movie. " Okay you've won." The purple eyed bishounen sighed,   
waiting intently for the movie Ryuichi would pick.   
  
Chibified, eyes twinkling as he turned, Ryuichi begged," Can we watch this one?"   
Displaying a copy of David Bowie's, The Labyrinth (YAY!), as he waddled over to   
the couch expectantly. " Pweeze!"  
  
" Hai, hai." Shuichi agreed, he didn't exactly see Ryuichi as that type, but   
tossed the thought away as he popped the tape in, turning on both the TV, and   
VCR, pressing play. He settled back down on the couch, with a sigh, hand   
searching for the remote as he fastforwarded through all of the previews.  
  
Somehow, through the course of the previews Ryuichi had lept onto the couch; and   
by the time Shuichi had pressed play, the brunette had curled up in his lap, a   
stick of pocky jutting out of the corner of his mouth. It was a little shocking   
at first, but he released his concerns; it was comfortable, and Ryuichi was too   
innocent to try anything.  
  
Shuichi wasn't sure when, but during the film, he felt the warmth surround him   
and his eyelids droop, drifting into a deepening slumber.  
  
~***~  
  
Shuichi could clearly hear, through the heavy curtains, the frantic cheers of   
thousands of anxious fans; the noise resounded in his ears, making his lood run   
fast in his veins, and his own anxiety was close to getting the better of him.   
Offstage, the group of six awaited their introduction; while the warm up band,   
another one sponsored by NG, reached their climax. Shuichi almost felt bad for   
the new band, sure it was their big break, but to try to satistfy so many fans,   
it even made him nervous.   
  
A soft tapping on his left shoulder broke him out of the momentary, fear induced   
trance, and he turned to face a smiling Ryuichi. The brunette was clad in his   
usual stage costume, as was Shuichi, and he was absolutely beaming. Pulling   
Shuichi's face mere inches from his own, he whispered only loud enough for the   
vocalist to hear, " Rage beat, " and winked mischeiviously. The music began to   
fade, and Shuichi could no longer ask exactly what the song title meant, but he   
had some idea that it corresponded with their plan. The Rage Beat was to be   
their last song of the night, upon Ryuichi's insistence, and now Shuichi could   
see why.   
  
The warm up band, Fire Wall, gave each of them a reassuring nod, the stress of   
entertaining the crowd obvious on their faces, as they walked past, and the   
purple eyed man gulped nervously. The butterflies in his stomach flapped   
uncontrollably, and he felt as though the sheer force with which they flapped   
would send him flying out of the building. Swallowing both his fear and anxiety,   
he bounced onto stage, behind Ryuichi, into the darkness; Mr.K had insisted that   
they enter in darkness, as a means of surprise, and to make an appearance as one   
band, arriving all at once. Sakuma's strong hand fell on Shuichi's shoulder,   
patting reassuringly while he whispered a near silent, "good luck."   
  
The lights burst on, their warmth instantly reaching the pink haired vocalist,   
and the roar of music erupted from the speakers to both his left and right. That   
familiar zest flooded his body, and his face contorted into the biggest smile he   
could manage, every pore on his body felt marinated in recognition, and   
confidence exploded from within him as did his voice. It was an exhilerating   
feeling, to have thousands of people screaming his name, but what was even more   
amazing, was teh way his voice was echoed by the angelic voice of Ryuichi, and   
Ryuichi his. It was as though they had melded into one, and it was the most   
amazing thing he had ever felt, even more amazing than the first timehe had sung   
with Sakuma-san.   
  
Purple eyes wandered to Sakuma Ryuichi, and the sheer awe was even present in   
his voice; this was his idol, the man he had idolized, not the Sakuma Ryuichi he   
had sleepovers with, this was the image he gave to his fans, and it left even   
Shuichi gaping in awe. Shaking the thought away, he threw all his energy into   
the words that burst from his heart, and his lips; his dream had come true, and   
he would not let himself ruin it.  
  
Nittle Graspers' songs echoed through him with the same fluency that his own   
did, as though they were one of his own, and song after song only left him an   
intensifying rapture. Self satistfaction would be way too weak a word to   
describe the pride he had in himself, and the happiness that threatened to drown   
him, but he pressed on with increasing vigor. The next song would be their last,   
Rage Beat, and the anticipation was almost too much to handle, their plan having   
gnawed at the back of his mind all night.   
  
The lights darkened once more, and he took a deep breath, eyes glued to the   
crowd, a smile painted across his face from ear to ear. Each second stretched,   
and his body tensed as music erupted from the speakers and the spotlights   
focused on him once more.   
  
" Obieta netsukide," his surprizingly deep voice was echoed by his idol and the   
words, 'his words' flooded out, as if released from behind a huge dam, projected   
onto the crowd. Every nerve in his body was ringing, a sheen of sweat covered   
his body, and his eyes sparkled.   
  
Shuichi let the microphone drop, Hiro's guitar solo taking over, and he gave   
himself time to catch his breath. However, strong arms wrapped around him, and   
he could fell Ryuichi's hot breath on his neck, the pink haired bishounen could   
not help but freeze, standing still in place.   
  
Moist lips trailed up and down his neck from behind, and a steady hands   
carressed his torso, one enicircling his navel while the other slid below,   
groping him knowledgebly. His skin felt as though it were on fire, and time   
seemed to freeze as the minstruations of his idol continued. Teeth nibbled on   
his earlobe, and the purple eyed bishounen almost melted backwards, a low purr   
escaping his half open lips; he could hear his heart beat loud in his ears, as   
though the vital organ pulsated in that exact location. Blood pooled in his   
groin, and he could feel himself hardening beneath the posessive caresses.   
  
The crowd cheered louder than he had ever imagined possible, roaring high above   
the music, drowning out the deafening speakers, a few feet away from him. It was   
then that Ryuichi released him, pulling away speedily, and leaving Shuichi's   
heated form alone. The vocalist could hear his partner's voice singing the   
remaining lyrics of the song, and he joined in, although lacking his former   
gusto. He was dazed, confused, and wanted more than anything to rush off of the   
stage.  
  
The end of the song seemed so far away, but he somehow lasted until it's end,   
and rushed off the stage directly afterwards. His feet propelled him at unknown   
speeds, and before long his was heaving from the corner of a locked bathroom   
stall. That was the last thing he had expected fan service to be, his innocence   
guarding against that possibility; and to make matters worse, he had enjoyed the   
experience, he was even aroused by it!   
  
Ryuichi had aroused him beyond anything Yuki had ever done, and had brought him   
to such lengths in such a short period of time. Things were not supposed to work   
out that way! He did it all for Yuki, betrayed him far more than his conscious   
would ever let him get away with; and yet, his thoughts kept returning to the   
event, longing...   
  
  
***End of Chapter Two*** Giggles insanely ^-^!!!  
  
By the way, I don't not own the Labyrinth ( Actually, I do own the movie, but I   
don't own rights) I just used the name because it's my favourite movie, so don't   
sue me ! 


	3. chapter 3

Everything I wish I had  
Author: Purrmeow  
Author's notes: My flight was postponed, (damned certificte of eligibility   
hasn't even come yet, so I have no Visa), so I am now able to write and post   
chapter three before I leave! YAY! By the way, I would like to thank everyone   
out there for the reviews, this is the best response I have ever gotten for my   
writing, and it was a great way to break out of my self loathing depression;   
Domo arigatou gozaimasu minna! I would also like to apologize for the mix up in   
posting the 2nd chapter, I screwed up while posting chapter ten of my Yami no   
Matsuei fic, and I thought I fixed it; but it only messed it up more. It's fixed   
now, and I hope it's done properly now... I don't have my own internet, so I can   
only check when I'm at my friends' house. Either way, thanks for the support,   
and read on. I'll miss you all in Japan, and I will write as soon as I get back,   
and even keep in touch with all of you if possible.  
  
Chapter Three  
  
His head throbbed, questions tormenting his mind as he attempted to curl into   
the smallest ball his body could imagine. He could hear them coming, Hiro's deep   
voice rising above the mass of producers, the cries of the fans, and his other   
bandmates.  
  
"Shuichi! Shuichi! Where are you Shuichi?!" Volume grew as the door to the   
bathroom burst open, and the redhead ran in. " Shuichi!"   
  
It was already too late, Shuichi could sware that he had been spotted, and it   
was only a matter of time before Hiro had him. His entire body was shaking as   
his arms wrapped protectively around the bishounen. He couldn't remember a time   
where he was more afraid; and to think that it was Hiro who induced such fear.   
Escape was the only thing on his mind, as the handle on his stall violently   
shook, the moment of discovery was iminent.   
  
The pink haired vocalist felt like a trapped animal, every cell tense as   
adrenaline pumped through his veins as readily as the blood that filled his   
system. Hair standing on end, Shuichi crouched, prepared to strike if the task   
became necessary.   
  
The stall door flew open, and behind it an infuriated Hiro heaved, shocked at   
the animalistic Shuichi that dashed out from the stall and the washroom in, no   
doubt, record speed. A little caught off guard, Hiro blinked a few times. 'Why   
is he running?' The red head asked himself with a confused expression. Half of   
his body told him to follow the over reacting vocalist; but the other half, his   
reasonable side, convinced him that it would potentially be the most harmful   
conclusion.  
  
~***~  
  
From behind golden locks, Yuki Eiri's golden eyes glared at the answering   
machine; it wasn't everyday that he came home to a hoard of messages, and 24 was   
far greater than expected. He knew that something was wrong, but couldn't place   
it before pressing the play button.   
  
"Yuki!" The machine cried, Shuichi's hyper tone perfectly replicated. "This is   
me, I just wanted to call and say that I think I'll be home early, nothing is   
really going on here at work. Either way..." The machine babbled on," I'll see   
ya later!"   
  
He felt his mood lighten, and pressing the erase button, proceeded, slightly   
curious as to the location of the pink haired man. It was quiet, and although he   
was more than welcoming the silence, he almost missed the vocalist's real voice,   
in it's melodic tone. Lighting up a cigarette, the blonde fell onto the couch   
and listened to the rest of the messages.   
  
The first few were more messages from a bored Shuichi, and Yuki twitched   
visably, maybe he didn't really miss the noise as much as he previously   
thought... However, the next couple of messages took on quite another tone, and   
the date had bumped up two days. Hiro's deep voice filled the room, and not in   
his usual calm tone, he sounded enraged as he yelled into the machine.  
  
"Shuichi! Are you there? What happened on stage? Call me as soon as you get   
this. It's Hiro, Ja!"  
  
Barely a few minutes later, as indicated by the machine, Hiro's agrevated voice   
returned. " Shuichi, I know that your there. Pick up the phone!"   
  
The next twenty messages were basic replicas of the first two, although it were   
blatantly obvious that the callers were quickly getting more and more agitated,   
to the point where Yuki had to turn down the machine just to tolerate listening.  
  
Having finished with the machine, Yuki rose off of the couch, and proceeded   
through the apartment, the answering machine fueling his urgency. "Shuichi!" He   
called, still not used to refering to the younger by his name. He threw every   
door open, frantically searched through all of the rooms, his anger growing with   
every repeated failure. Shuichi was gone, he was no longer in the apartment, nor   
the building; Yuki knew there was only one more place the vocalist could have   
gone, seeing that all of NG had left messages questioning the whereabouts of the   
bishounen.   
  
Lifting his jacket off of the arm of the chair, the blonde proceeded out the   
apartment, and into his ebony car, eyes narrowed as he drove along the   
unfamiliar path to Shuichi's parent's house.  
  
~***~   
  
Shuichi nearly cowered back into the corner as a curious Sakuma Ryuichi   
approached, his blue eyes speculatively glancing at the nervous vocalist. "Why   
haven't you been coming to work?" The hyperactive brunette began, kneeling   
before the shaking pink haired man, "Did you not have fun at the concert?" His   
navy eyes quivered in time with his lip.  
  
" No! It's not that it's just..." Shuichi quickly attempted to recover, hands   
waving back and forth before him. He was still a little tense around Sakuma-san,   
his feelings for the rock god uncertain, and those for Yuki questionably   
wavering. He was deathfully afraid to be in such close proximity to his idol,   
considering the last few moments they had shared together, but he felt no need   
to share that with the genki Ryuichi.   
  
It may have seemed a little odd, but this Ryuichi didn't stir up any of the   
feelings that the stage Ryuichi did; but the knowledge that they were one in the   
same left him still feeling apprehensive. He relaxed a little though, allowing   
his body to sink against the wall, and his eyes to stare into Sakuma-san's   
curiously.  
  
Before anything else could register, Ryuichi's lips fell upon his own, soft and   
puckered as they met Shuichi's moist and tightened lips. For a few seconds, he   
allowed his body to drink in the sensation, to taste his role model as he never   
had before. Then he threw himself backwards, smashing into the wall behind him   
with a harsh thud.  
  
His head span, his eyes widened, his pupils dialated, and his heart was thumping   
so loud, he could swear Ryuichi could hear it. That was the last thing he had   
expected, and it felt so good, yet so wrong. How was it that the energetic   
vocalist could stir up so much within Shuichi with so little? It didn't make any   
sense, and that frightened him more than he could ever imagine possible.   
  
"Shuichi..." Sakuma Ryuichi's deep voice echoed in his ears, that expression and   
that tone so familiar, and yet so distant. The Sakuma-san that had showed up at   
his door was gone, instead the serious, sexy, stage Sakuma knelt before him, his   
face mere inches from Shuichi's own.  
  
" A-an-ano.. Sakuma-san..." Shuichi stuttered, skin tingling as the brunette's   
warm breath tickling his cheek. The other leaned even closer, sandwiching   
Shuichi between himself and the wall that the redhead had so conveniently   
propped himself against.   
  
" Shuichi, why hesitate? Doesn't it feel good?" The incredibly charismatic   
Ryuichi purred against Shuichi's earlobe, sending shivers up and down the   
younger's spine. His hot tongue lashed out against the redhead's earlobe, and   
his teeth nibbled at the loose, and sensitive skin as he awaited a response.  
  
Mewling helplessly, Shuichi melted, breath quickening as his stomach seemed to   
fill with butterflies, which flapped about more relentlessly than they had at   
his concert debut. It was and felt so wrong, while his body sung for more   
attention, arching against the minstruations of the elder.   
  
Never before had he felt so desired, so needed; Yuki was never so insistant, so   
tender. His words were always harsh and accusatory, his articulate tongue   
lashing out more harshly than his fists ever could; however, Sakuma-san used his   
for a much more intruiging purpose, melodiously inticing millions.  
  
The brunette's seemingly experienced lips wandered, nipping at the pink haired   
man's bare throat with need, and Shuichi hardened just as he had on stage those   
few days ago. 'This is WRONG!' His mind hollered, it's voice loud in his ear,   
mixed with the music of his heavily beating heart, and their heated breathing.   
He had to repeat the thought and order over and over before it registered, shock   
obvious on his face and the stiffening of his body.  
  
"Sakuma-san!" Shuichi shouted as he forcefully hurled the elder off of his   
aroused body, lifting himself off the ground as he stared in disbelief at the   
body that had brought him such pleasure for the second time, breathless. He   
didn't know what to say, or how to bring himself to say it; he had betrayed his   
love for the second time, and in one week nonetheless.  
  
"Gomen nasai!" He shouted as his legs brought him out of the room at top speed,   
tears obstructing his vision, shame clouding the undrawn path that he ran.   
'Doshite? Doshite?!'(*why*) he asked himself over and over again, shaking his   
head form side to side as he increased the speed of his escape even more.  
  
Crashing with all the force of his running, he flew back, and the form he hit   
mirrored the action. Glancing up, tears streaming down his cheeks, he focused on   
the individual before him, the other rubbing the back of his head irritably.   
Shuichi gaped at the novelist for a few seconds, his voice caught in his   
throat." Yu-yuki..." he whispered, the blonde turning his deep, golden eyes on   
the tearful Shuichi curiously.  
  
With all of the spotlights on him, and the deep voice of Sakuma-san echoing from   
his room behind him, Shuichi did the thing he thought most sensible at the   
moment; he ran.  
  
"Shuichi!" Both Yuki and Ryuichi called in unison at the steadily retreating   
form, before their eyes met in a stone cold glare. They both knew Shuichi was   
not returning, or at least not at the present, and both held one another   
responsible.  
  
  
***End of Chapter Three*** ^-^ This is probably the last chapter I will write   
before I go, unless I am hounded by readers, and I am finally on the right track   
again. Anxious to hear what you all have to say! Reviews?! ^-~ Luv ya all lots! 


	4. Chapter 4

Everything I wish I had  
Author:Purrmeow  
Author's notes: I'm back at it minna!!!!! Right here from Japan, and finally ready to continue with the battle of the bishies! I'll try and update as much as possible, and I also appologize for everyone's lovely reviews being deleted, but rules are rules. All we can do is make up for those lost reviews by reviewing lots after this chappie! *grins* I will continue faster if I get more reviews!! But please continue, and if you really like it, check out my other Gravitation stuff!   
  
Chapter Four  
  
Shuichi was long gone, and chasing after the boy would have probably proven fruitless anyhow, afterall, if Shuichi genuinely didn't want to be caught, then he wouldn't, end of story. But with the presence of the usually genki vocalist absent, the two bishounen now had a free and open battle field, perhaps a challenge of worth, among the two artists of text, who's deep and hate filled stares could probably destroy a man of lesser will. The brunette advanced, his footsteps echoing on the hardwood floor ominously, bouncing off the empty walls and escaping down the staircase; his glare did not lighten, if anything it got deeper, and even more threatening. It may have been to compensate for his lacking height, which was steadily becoming more apparent as he neared the blonde, but he was not in the slightest shaken, mindset, and strong.  
  
His voice was cool, cooler than ice when he finally spoke, one hand gripping tightly to the novelists black tie, forcing the blonde to crick his neck at an uncomfortable angle to stare into the deathly orbs of blue. "You know Yuki," the way that name rolled off Sakuma Ryuichi's tongue sent shivers up and down Yuki's spine, "you really should take better care of Shuichi." A chuckle broke the sentence, "or should I say, should have?"  
  
Yuki's brows furrowed, tightly clenched at the center, as his glare deepened, Ryuichi's vocal torture continuing. "He deserves so much better than what you gave him. And the funny thing is, he's starting to realize that, too bad for you hun?" Shrugging, releasing his hold on the taller man, he turned away, "Well, there's no use trying to change the past. You lose, Yuki Eiri."   
  
Hands thrust into his pockets, he proceeded to the staircase, completely abandoning the speechless blonde behind him. But it seemed entirely too good to be true, and the architecture of the house did an excellent job of echoing the novelists booming voice. he could tell that he had hit a nerve, and that this was going to prove to be a harder task than imagined. "What makes you think that I've so quickly been thrust out of the game?"   
  
This was beginning to become entertaining.   
  
Ryuichi halted in his path, turning his stonecold eyes back up to his refreshed opponent, "oh, so the old man's finally managed to lodge those tricks out of his overly tight sleeves?" The brunette mocked, returning to the top of the steps, and meeting the other's challenge face to face.  
  
"As if I care though," it was the elder's turn to shrug it off now, a smug grin curving the corner's of his mouth. "Do what you wish, he'll just come back to me, he always does." Those last words both purred and hissed at the same time, causing the hair at the nape of Ryuichi's neck to stand on end.   
  
That was a low blow! For both he and Shuichi, and he could feel his blood boiling at the crude comment, the brunette about to burst. Any detest he had for the man, quadrupled at those simple words, and his fists clenched so tightly, that his knuckles blanched. Angrily stomping up to the six foot one figure (that's just a guess), closing the once safe distance between the two, daggers shot from his eyes upwards to meet those emitted form Yuki's. And then, in one swing, all that bottled up anger shot out from within the singer and directed at the stone cold blonde.  
  
"KUMAGORO BEAM!!!!!" The stuffed rabbit collided with Yuki Eiri's cold features at full speed, sending the novelist a few feet backwards before the now chibified Sakuma continued. "You really are an evil man! I hate you!!!!" And in tears, the vocalist sped down the stairs, and out the house before the blonde could inject anything else.  
  
Growling, hard hand massaging the place where the plastic eye had caused to flame (those plastic eyes really hurt! Too much sibling rivalry), golden eyes glared at the cloud of smoke that once was a worthy opponent. He truly didn't mean what he said, he was honestly worried, otherwise he wouldn't have travelled all this way to retrieve the loudmouthed, overly hyper, and incredibly cute, vocalist; however, admitting that was as bad as admitting defeat, and Yuki Eiri never loses.  
  
***  
  
His arms clenched so tightly around his balling form that he could swear that his entire body was going numb from the pain, but that, infact anything, was better than this inner turmoil. He had finally retreated to the one person that was always there for him, and although he knew he would eventually have to explain the entire situation to his fairly clueless companion, it felt good to know that he wouldn't have to put up with anymore unexpected, but acted upon, attractions. For the past hour he had merely sat at the corner of Hiro's overly tidy bed, in Hiro's overly tidy room, in Hiro's overly tidy apartment; and it all felt so safe, and so cozy.  
  
"Please just don't ask." Shuichi requested for about the fortieth time, even though Hiro hadn't made a move to say anything since the first time, and the pink haired bishounen cowered even further into the corner. "Just promise me that if either Yuki or Sakuma-san come to the door, I'm not here."   
  
Hiro nodded for the fortieth time as well, fingers plucking absentmindedly at the strings of his guitar in an attempt to distract his racing thoughts. He had know Shuichi for the bulk of their lives, and could probably truthfully claim to know the other better than anyone in the world; and he knew, that given time, Shuichi would spill it all on his own, it was the waiting that was always killer...  
  
"Oh Hiro, I have to tell someone,"  
  
`Right on cue`, the guitarist smiled to himself as he absently set the guitar against the amplifier, and scooted closer to the smaller (SCOOT!!! LOVE THAT WORD *ahem* sorry, I had to), Shuichi had a tendancy to be clingy when he let these kinda things out, and Hiro needed to be prepared, lest sacrifice his apartment...  
  
"It seemed like such a good idea to start out with, I mean, we could have sold another million, and then I could go on another date with Yuki; but then it actually happened, and although it felt amazing, I was so afraid. I didn't know what to do, so I ran, I ran as fast as I could, and as far..." The waterworks had already begun, and Hiro was quick to pull the smaller into his arms, cradling him there as he continued on with his story, intently listening.  
  
"...as far as I could, but they somehow found me. I really don't know how I feel anymore, about anyone! It's all so messed up. My body says yes, but I know it's so very wrong, and I don't know what to do anymore. I thought I'd be safe at home, with my mom, but they found me again. And it happened again. Oh Hiro, it felt so good! Sakuma-san did, but what about Yuki? And then I ran again! And there Yuki was, and he looked so angry. So I ran some more. I ran, and I ran, and I ran, and I ran, and I swear they are still following me."  
  
The teary eyes he turned up on Hiro were so blood shot, and still so hard to refuse; it had always been hard to sat no to Shuichi, and yet he had to on so many occasions, for the other's own good. "Please don't let them find me Hiro! Please!!"  
  
Finally having been awarded a chance to put in his own comments, certain that Shuichi was finished with his rant, Hiro softly pet Shuichi's unruly mop of pink, tucking the other back beneath his chin. He could feel and hear the other wiping his nose on Hiro's tear damp, white t-shirt, and although the image made him cring visibly, he had more important things to deal with at the moment. "Don't worry Shuichi, you're safe here." Softening his voice, barely above a whisper, he continued to croon the tiny vocalist, until he could feel Shuichi's breathing go even, and was certain that the other had fallen asleep.  
  
Laying Shuichi down in his bed, and tucking the other in tightly, Hiro sighed; it may have seemed like a thoroughly exhausting day for Hiro, but he could only imagine how bad it must have been for Shuichi. Softly petting a flushed, and tear stained cheek, Hiro's soft, and deep voice whispered, "don't worry, I'll protect you." Lighting a cigarette, Hiro retreated to the living room, turning off the light, and leaving his best friend to sleep in peace. Tomorrow was definitely going to be an exhausting day, and Hiro wanted to be fully rested, to brace himself for the full impact of the impending conflict.  
  
  
***End of Chapter Four*** I know it took forever, but it's finally ready!!! I know it's shorter than the other's but it's better than nothing. And I know that Ryuichi seemed really super cold at the beginning of the chapter, but to go with that other personality, I decided to add both bark, and bite. Hope you enjoyed it! And I won't continue without reviews, so I hope you get the picture!!! 


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